So yesterday morning, I woke up in near paralysis. It felt as though needles were being shoved into every inch of my spinal column, from the top of my neck down to my tail bone. So I've been in bed for the past two days with only my crappy laptop to keep me company, missing class, missing work. The only good news is that I've been able to watch some movies and listen to music I've been meaning to update myself on. Notably, I finally saw Dr. Strangelove, which when Corey and I were dating, he talked about in high esteem (I still haven't seen 2001, but I still want to see it in his company. Not sure if he does, though). I enjoyed the movie. Very similar to some of my other tastes- dark, offbeat, taboo. Dr. Strangelove himself is simply an amazing character and although he isn't in much of the movie, he totally steals the show for me.
I'm sort of at a loss as to what to do with myself. I'm in a lot of pain and usually I'd just play warcraft through it until I got better. But none of my computers will run it anymore. I need a new system, hands down. I want a beast of a computer, an absolute monster. Any suggestions?
I think I'll download the Spore Character Creator and make some dino-aliens.
Before I go, I leave you with the following song. It's the song Creep by Radiohead, but covered by a group of 60 young Flemish women. It's absolutely beautiful. Even if you don't like Radiohead, this is an amazing choral piece. Give it a listen.
You can watch live webcam feed of the Hadron Collider. If you don't know about the project, I really think you should read about it. The project simulates the milliseconds after t=0 ; in other words, The Big Bang. If this works, small blackholes may develope inside the experiement. Though some are afraid that the blackholes might be too massive for the collider to contain, it's highly unlikely to swallow up the whole earth as we know it.
I'm honestly worried with the growing popularity of the McCain/Palin ticket. Polls these past few days usually show McCain almost 5 points ahead of Obama and I'm starting to think that progressive thinkers might not have a turn this upcoming term. I can't imagine what it would be like to have Governor Palin, a candidate who thinks the universe is 6,000 years old and that embryonic cells have more right to life than adults with debilitating diseases, to have a person like that in office. How can we possibly vote someone in who believes in sky hooks? Are we THAT stupid?... The Bush Administration... You think we would have learned.
I can't afford to go on a rampage right now, but I leave you with the following from Jon Stewart:
Little Miss Infidel got dumped late Tuesday night.
It was unexpected and a little shocking, but really put into perspective how important communication within a relationship is.
For the entirety of my recent relationship, I completely avoided any talk of anything remotely emotional. Looking back, I'm not quite sure why, though. Was I afraid that it would make him feel awkward? Was I embarrassed that I had emotions?
Or maybe it just seemed like a waste of time, since we were perfectly fine talking about more objective subjects, things we were more interested in. We shared a love for super smash brothers, quantum theory, Jodie Foster, morbid surrealism, eel sauce, Half-Life (one and two), Blizzard games, Opeth, Massive Attack, dinosaurs among so many other things. We could converse for extended periods about things like the corruption inside religion, women's rights, whether Aqua Teen or Metalocalypse was the better cartoon, and whether or not Sam Harris is the most suave neuroscientist in the secular community. The conversation was simply stimulating. It was something I craved and enjoyed.
But our similarities couldn't hold the relationship together. Our differences in appreciation for music, the way that we formulated our opinions, and how openly we discussed those things were something that simmered negatively, though ignored. I always thought our differences added interesting discussions in our relationship. I learned a lot, my mind was changed on some topics, and I enjoyed being challenged. But he didn't and in the end, it became the dealbreaker.
I wish I had known that now. And I would have had I just asked. Had we just talked about it, I would have known. And this break up wouldn't have blind-sided me the way it did.
We were going into 5 months of dating and we were never publicly affectionate. All in all, we seemed to pal around more than act like a couple. And I'm okay with that because it means we can still pal around. I haven't lost my friend, I just lost my date. It'll be a little awkward not getting a goodbye kiss anymore, but we can still bicker about whether or not Judas Priest's vocalist is obnoxious or glorious.
And so, I think I might get through this okay. If anything, I've learned a great deal about myself, about intelligence, about communication.